MMM-Peach-Mint® Iced Tea

A suggested govern-mint concoction that combines bitter tears and sour lemons with the sweet, sweet satisfying taste of Mmm-Peach-Mint® Iced Tea. Share at your next partisan political soiree – namely the upcoming Senate trial.


  • 1 cup packed fresh mint leaves
  • 181-197 tears of partisan republicans
  • 2 right-wing tea bags
  • 1 can of white house swamp peaches, not drained
  • ¼ cup fresh lemon juice
  • ½ cup sugar to help all that medicine go down
  • cold, cold ice

Using a wooden spoon, crush the mint just like you crushed their objections and stalling tactics into a glass pitcher. Add tears and tea bags; cover and let stand in the sun for at least 6 hours of debate.

Meanwhile, combine those swamp peaches, sour lemons and sugar in a blender. Keep it chill, yo.

Remove and discard mint from tea. Stir in peach mixture. Pour over the cold, cold ice your democratic peers just delivered.

Mmm-Peach-Mint tea should be savored. Take your time to relax and fully enjoy it when you knock that drink down.

Of course, if you’re sitting across the aisle and looking for a stronger drink, then consider my recipe for the salt-rimmed Ermahgerdarita®.